The problem with a break up/heart break is that there is no easy way out. Your friends can’t really help you, nor can alcohol, nor can *cringe* whatever you think is a good idea after a few drinks at the SU. Heartbreak is still there in your bed the morning after (usually along with a stranger). Heartbreak is a post -it note. A bright, unavoidable reminder of how happy you were and the person you lost. The weird thing is absolutely everyone goes through heart break and everyone deals with it or fails to deal with it in certain ways. However, when you ask someone how to deal with heart-break they can’t give you a straight answer. Time is a word that gets thrown around a lot. But how much time? A week? Maybe if you’re 14 and don’t know what love is, a month? But thats four weeks, that’s four fab Fridays and twenty working weekdays I have to endure. A year? God forbid.
I had my heart broken once before when I was fifteen. I cried in my mom’s arms and told her how it felt like no one would ever love me or even care about me again. She replied, as mother’s do, with possibly the best advice which I thought was completely untrue and a little stupid at the time. She told me of course I’d fall for someone again and be happy (I did, however, that ended. Hence this post) and that one day I’d wake up and simply be fine again. I cannot pin point how long it took for me to get over my juvenile love. But the point is, I got over it. I have no idea how long it takes to get over someone I actually really care about.
Now it has happened again I’m in the same situation, it does feel like I’ll never find anyone good for me again, even though I sincerely hope I do. But my mom isn’t physically with me to reassure me it’ll be okay because I’m a few hundred miles away at University. I suddenly feel as though I’ve been plummeted into adulthood and have to deal with my love problems on my own. The thing is I almost feel bad for being heart broken at University. I feel sorry for myself because no matter where I turn there are couples walking around on campus and serious PDAs at the SU. Not only do I feel sorry for my miserable self, I feel as though I’m wasting my time at University being upset about something amazing that ended in my life because University is supposed to be about having fun and playing the field and I guess, maybe sometimes, about studying.
Time does in fact seem to be the answer to heartbreak. Not re runs of The Notebook, or sad Smith’s songs, nor is the solution found with sex with anyone else, or alcohol. Because, trust me, I tried. You wake up in the morning not only with your ex on your mind but with a cracking hangover. Eventually you’ll stop feeling as though Mike Tyson has punched you right through your chest or that your heart weighs heavier than Richard Branson’s wallet. But only time will tell – I cannot fucking wait for that time to come.