How Not To Do Freshers Week

This is not an article that will detail that fine delicate balance between the cliché extremes of ‘working hard and having fun’, for several reasons. Those sorts of articles are patronising, unenlightening, and generally written by people who frankly know how to do neither.
Instead, I will impart a few quick recommendations regarding what not to do during the VK sponsored inauguration ritual that is Fresher’s week.
Do not, under any circumstances, even consider the remote possibility of spending a single night inside your room. For this week, there are no ‘early nights’. You have just arrived, all you have are blank A4 sheets and an empty timetable. You have nothing to be early for.
Do not call your friends out the back of Medicine or the SU (these places will become familiar to you) on a night out. You are surrounded by people that will be around when you carve an unrecognisably impressive version of yourself in three years’ time. Do not insult them by having a ‘catch up’ with Barbara from College.
Do not close the door to your bedroom during the entire week. I doubt you are a Holloway student if you need this one explaining. By closing your door, you are metaphorically, literally and actually, closing the door on all the people you can meet, all the conversations you can hold, the hall parties, the everything. Don’t be an idiot.
And there we have it, now go kill it.
“Get action. Seize the moment. Man was never intended to become an oyster.” Theodore Roosevelt.