Tuesday, August 9

Tag: dating

Heart-Broken: simply ‘Move on’?
Lifestyle

Heart-Broken: simply ‘Move on’?

Why telling somebody to move on from a breakup is unhelpful Most of us in our teenage years will go through a breakup at some point. I can undoubtedly say that going through one is an awful experience. The questioning, crying, and loss of your favourite person is truly painful. Your shoulder to cry on is suddenly gone, and there is nothing you can do to change that. In these times, we seek comfort in those around us, hoping that they will offer good advice. But their first line of consolation is too often: "I'm really sorry that happened, you have to try to just move on." Saying this to someone going through the motions, the ups and downs of feeling better and significantly worse, is insensitive.  In the first few weeks of losing somebody who you thought would be in your life fo...
Not a Friendly Ghost
Lifestyle

Not a Friendly Ghost

Ghosting has been a popular topic with every infamous dating columnist in the last few months. From Sunday Times journalist Dolly Alderton to Cosmopolitan sex writer Carina Hsieh, it’s really all anyone’s been talking about. Ghosting is when a person ends a platonic or romantic relationship, or in the vernacular of university dating - a “thing”, by not replying to messages or calls and just ignoring you until you ‘get the message’. If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of ghosting, you can attest that it is The Worst. It’s horrible when someone you liked, care about or even love decides one day that they don’t want to talk to you again, wihtout any explanation. But, while we all condemn the ghoster and sympathise with the ghosted, can we all honestly say that we haven’t ghosted anyone?...
It’s The Rule of Thirds
Lifestyle

It’s The Rule of Thirds

Yes, that’s right, I am not in a relationship. That’s not for you to coo at sadly, or to pat me on the back with a patronising ‘you’ll find someone’ – it’s just a fact. For the most part, I am quite happy with being single and, excluding the occasional drunken swipe on Tinder, I do not find myself yearning for a boyfriend. However, there is one thing that makes me wish I was in the relationship: most of my friends are in one. Of course, I want my friends to be happy and I definitely like some of their significant others. But, it gets quite lonely to not be in a relationship when everyone aorund you is in one. Every time a new movie is playing, I am left to go alone or to wait until it’s inevitably made its way to a streaming platform while all my friends skulk off hand-in-hand with their ...
‘Nice Guys Finish Last’
Lifestyle

‘Nice Guys Finish Last’

Nice guys finish last’ has to be one of my least favourite phrases in the English language, pipped to the post perhaps only by ‘the friend zone’. Yet time and time again, in conversations, online and in films and TV, the idea that women ignore the ‘nice guys’ in favour of a bad boy  is pervasive in our culture. To the guys who are respectful and kind to women, the ones who will go to Women’s Marches, lift up their female colleagues at work, and call themselves feminists I will say this: it’s great that you’re a feminist, it’s great that you respect women, but that still doesn’t mean that woman you catch eyes with over the morning papers on the underground simply must date you. Being a ‘nice guy’ is a reward in itself, it makes you a better person, and society better as a whole. But th...
Tinder: Does it really work?
Lifestyle

Tinder: Does it really work?

With our lives getting busier by the minute and it becoming much harder to find time to at least have some sort of dating life, online dating communities on apps like Tinder have grown significantly. But do they really work? Are people actually using them with the intention to meet and date people? With 1.6 billion daily swipes on the app, you’d think you would surely be able to meet someone or have the busiest dating life ever, right? Not necessarily. Only 54% of Tinder users are actually single, so just under half the people you are swiping every day are engaged in some sort of relationship with someone else - not quite so reassuring now is it… Even those who are single, it can be so difficult to gage what someone else wants just from a few pictures and a couple of sentences about the...
Disastrous Dating: Single Girls Struggle Through Uni
Lifestyle

Disastrous Dating: Single Girls Struggle Through Uni

“Your dating history is as smooth as Egyptian Whisky!”   A friend commented last year and although my first reaction was to throw a tumbler full of Jack Daniels in his face I chose to laugh it off, as he was completely correct. I have thought about this comment at various moments over the past year and have come to conclusion that being a single girl at university is nauseating and like a sour whisky the mouth goes numb and you want to spit it out and run!   I have had a ‘date, I did not know was a date.’ He came round to my flat to cook for me, then spent two hours eating his food whilst dropping it into conversation that he was a virgin. The word awkward doesn’t even come close to describing the atmosphere, turning as red as the wine I wanted my empty bowl to swallo...
Lifestyle

The Science of Online Dating

Before starting my post-grad, I was a dating consultant for a few years. In that time I saw the explosion of dating sites from Match and Plenty of Fish, to popular “casual” apps like Tinder. Many of my clients had used them. They are easy to use, but many of my clients would get it wrong; therefore, not get their desired results. On campus I have met students who use dating sites and have asked me for advice. When looking at their profiles I am shocked to see they are making the same mistakes I have seen others do in the past. Here is my guide to online dating. *Say “cheese”!* Online dating is like going to the supermarket – you look and examine what is on the shelf before choosing what you want based on the look and feel of what is on offer. That is why Tinder is popular as it fits...