As winter is now upon us, it is the prime time for chick-flicks and movies which are
objectively terrible but also provide a sense of comfort. In nearly all these movies there is a
socially popular, pretty and vain teenager or young adult who eventually learns there is more
to life than the next Gucci handbag, a sort of Scrooge ending to the stories. This brings home
the message of what we were taught when we were younger, to be considerate and care for
others around us, to not be vain. Vanity is chained to feelings of selfishness, being self-
obsessed or being wrapped up in ones-self. Therefore vanity is bad, right? Of course, we may
agree with this statement, however the qualities of being vain may not be all negative. To be
vain can be an accumulation of different qualities such as being narcissistic, self-absorbed,
perhaps attention seeking and self-loving, the last quality particularly interests me. Self-
loving is seen to be a synonym for vanity although I do not think they are entirely one and the
same .
In recent years the movement of self-love and self-care has been recognised as an
overarching mental health movement to promote better personal wellbeing, to prioritise your
needs and to show yourself kindness. Lord knows that everyone could do with a mental-
health day now and then. Whether it is just the pressure of getting older with more
responsibilities or if there is further research into diagnosing mental health it can be noted
that younger people are presenting with mental distress, “one in seven 10-19-year-olds
experience a mental disorder” (World Health Organisation, 2024). Of course this is upsetting,
therefore the movement to promote self-care is becoming more popular to lower this surge.
Preaching that vanity is a good quality is not entirely the backbone of this writing, however to
take qualities or the simple synonym of the word; self-love could and should be welcomed.
Maybe additional qualities of vanity should be considered such as the lack of care in other
people’s views of yourself, again, people are awfully concerned with strangers or friends
opinions of their appearance and frequently question whether they have acted or said the
‘correct’ thing but when it boils down to it, we are all the main character of our own little
movie. I highly doubt that Sarah form biology is thinking ‘what a gross top Keira was
wearing today’. Okay I don’t know a Sarah and I do not study biology but still, you
understand my point. It may all be the terrible movies which are flooding my TV lately but I
think to myself that the qualities of vanity may not entirely be such a terrible embodiment, we
just have to be careful not to jump headfirst into it, maybe just dip your toe into the qualities
you feel are right. Perhaps one day you feel that it is in your best interest to be self-absorbed
and wrapped up in your own means and the next be humble and modest, life is all about
balance. To put your oxygen mask on before you help others is not the definition of vanity by
any means, it recognises that you need to look after yourself before you can help those
around you. I think being a teeny-tiny bit selfish once in a while will not cause you to end up
like all those vain, narcissistic characters in low budget movies which we seem to love but
will help you feel appreciated by the one person who truly matters, yourself. I know those
around me and myself included are worried about being judged as selfish or maybe even vain
however I think as long as people keep a balance of being modest, self-absorbed, kind, selfish
and self-loving then there’s a mix of just being human.
Image: Ryoji Iwata via Unsplash